Let’s Talk Dirty

“EMOTIONS- Taking me over”

Emotions, they’re messy, complicated and above all sometimes overwhelming. However, we all feel and express them, but are we doing so the correct way? Emotions by definition are strong feelings that derive from circumstances, moods, or relationships we have with others. They’re also instinctive or intuitive feelings distinguished from reasoning or knowledge. In lay-man’s terms emotions are basically our inner feelings towards our situations, and we all have them.

The six basic emotions that are usually accepted for us to express are Happiness, Sadness, Fear, Anger, Surprise and Disgust, but there are so many other emotions that it’s sometimes hard to keep track and explain what we’re feeling when we’re feeling it. When we show these emotions, we do so in different ways and at different times and sometimes two or more together. Here me out! I can start my day off right, all happy, cheerful and optimistic ready for whatever may come my way. I’ve got the right books in my Sprayground for a good day’s work (Yeah right, you know it’s my shoebox with my cleaning supplies for my Suede Clarks), and I’ve even got my lucky pen, you know the one that makes my writing look good maybe a binder-sheet or two. Then, all of a sudden, I’m in a “bad mood” because that one person that always a violate looked at me in assembly when Greene a chat. Now my whole day’s ruined, the teacher asking me for homework she know she didn’t give me, I lost the $50 I had in the back of my phone case and “ma partna” just lub man! All of this happening before 3^rd period and on top of that Ms. King don’t want to tell us what school meal have today. Whew! Now that’s A LOT and I don’t even know what I’m feeling at this point.

With all these emotions one has to find a way to ground one’s self, meaning… Jus cool, ya check? So, here’s how:

1. Ask myself the most important question first.
   1. Do I know what I’m feeling? Knowing and understanding what you’re feeling is the easiest and safest way to know what your options are and what your next move should be. It’s the difference between getting back to your happy place and being in detention with the Principal. Taking a moment to check in with yourself about your mood can help you begin to regain control.

• Regulate don’t Repress.
  • You can’t control your emotions with a dial (if only it were that easy!). But imagine, for a moment, that you could manage emotions this way. You wouldn’t want to leave them running at maximum all the time. You wouldn’t want to switch them off entirely, either. When you suppress or repress emotions, you’re preventing yourself from experiencing and expressing feelings. When learning to manage your emotions, make sure you aren’t just sweeping them under the rug. Healthy emotional expression involves finding some balance between overwhelming emotions and no emotions at all.

• Accept your emotions, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.
  • Accepting emotions as they come helps you get more comfortable with them. Increasing your comfort around intense emotions allows you to fully feel them without reacting in extreme, unhelpful ways.

• Take a deep breath!
• Slowing down and paying attention to your breath won’t make the emotions go away but it can help you ground yourself and take a step back from the first intense flash of emotion and any extreme reaction you want to avoid. So next time you might want to try these steps:
  • Breathe in slowly…Hold it (don’t pass out)
  • Mantra- tell yourself “I am calm, I am relaxed.”
  • Breathe out slowly…Smile. You’re doing fine.

• Know when to express yourself.
• There’s a time and place for everything, including intense emotions. “Bawling murda” crying uncontrollably is a pretty common response to losing a loved one, but would you do that if a mosquito bit you? Being mindful of your surroundings and the situation can help you learn when it’s OK to let feelings out and when you might want to sit with them for the moment.

Now, this doesn’t mean that overnight you’ll be perfect at handling emotions. As we see in some of the adults still walking around with “screwface” from childbirth, it takes time. But, if you’re ready to put in the effort to know how to keep your emotions in check, then you’ve already taken the most important step.

Try to keep it clean, try to keep it classy, but Let’s Talk Dirty!